Take off

Yesterday while waiting for my flight to push back the lady next to me pulls out a pocket bible, rosary beads and some other book with Jesus on the cover. As we taxi she's giving her rosary beads all kinds of action with her eyes closed. After take off she looks at me and says, "Isn't Jesus great?" I'm thinking oh great, if I don't put a stop this right quick and in a hurry this could easily be the longest flight ever. I look at her and then down at her pile of Jesus books. I tell her, "Before I answer let me tell you this. I fully support your religion, it's what makes this country great. I know that many religions require you to carry forth said gospel and recruit others into your way, and I'm even ok with that. So....if you'd like to talk about your religion lets do it. However, in the spirt of good conversation after we spend some time talking about the topic of your choice; which is clearly Jesus we should then spend some time talking about a topic of my choice. I feel it only fair to warn you, I'm one twisted individual and I'd prefer to talk about things Jesus would most likely frown upon. Now, let's get down to it shall we?" Long silence ensues. She clutches her beads and says, "I think it would just be best if we didn't speak to each other and I will pray for your soul sir." I think things would have been fine until the other guy in our row reaches over to high five me. She promptly informed us both that we'd be headed straight to hell.